


Goodbyes

by elisetales



Category: Starfighter (Comic)
Genre: Angst, Blue Team, Cuddling, Fluff, Friendship, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-01-27
Updated: 2013-01-27
Packaged: 2017-11-27 01:59:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,146
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/656816
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/elisetales/pseuds/elisetales
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The night before Deimos and Phobos are scheduled to depart for the Blue Team's mission, Abel and Deimos say their goodbyes.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Goodbyes

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Scared](https://archiveofourown.org/works/640042) by [orphan_account](https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account). 



Abel came by the room that night before Deimos was scheduled to depart, alone and still in his clean white uniform. Phobos wasn't back from the lab yet; Deimos guessed Abel had timed the visit perfectly for when he knew Phobos wouldn't be around.

"Can I come in?" Abel asked when Deimos answered the door, still so polite even after all this time. Deimos stood back against the door and waved Abel in, closed it behind them and crossed the room to join Abel on the edge of the mattress.

"So," Abel said, wearing an overly bright smile, "all ready, then?" He glanced around the bare room, which was stripped of all Deimos' and Phobos' possessions now; anywhere but at Deimos' face.

Deimos stared at him. "For?"

"You're leaving early in the morning," Abel answered with a little frown, stating the obvious, like somehow Deimos had forgotten he and Phobos were being sent to their deaths tomorrow.

Deimos just said, "I know," and cleared his throat, picked at a scuff-mark on his pants and leaned forward with his forearms on his thighs, eyes fixed to the floor and listening to the dry rattle of the air filter. He felt Abel's warm hand on the centre of his back a few moments later.

"Are you okay?" Abel asked him, voice small and careful.

"Yes," Deimos quietly returned. They'd had this conversation more than once over the last few days, but Abel never stopped asking, almost like he wanted Deimos to break down in front of him and admit he was petrified. Deimos wouldn't, not to him.

"Good." Abel looped his arm under Deimos' and sought out his hand, threading their fingers together when he found it and letting his arm rest against Deimos' knee. Deimos squeezed Abel's bony fingers, let his thumb brush across the soft skin of Abel's inner-wrist.

"Phobos isn't doing too well though, is he?" Abel murmured after a moment, shuffling closer on the bed until their sides were pressed warmly together.

"What makes you say that?"

Abel took a breath, hesitated a moment, then said, "He started crying in the lab today. Keeler told him to get down to medical; I think they're giving him something to sleep."

"Oh." The news didn't surprise Deimos, though it still stung. Didn't matter how close he pulled Phobos at night, how many times he fucked him or how hard; he couldn't stop the nightmares from coming, couldn't stop Phobos being so afraid.

Problem was Phobos had always trusted him too much, trusted him to keep them both safe. Only now was he starting to realize Deimos couldn't keep him safe from anything, and especially not from this.

"I told him you'd look after him," Abel said then, and it was the last thing Deimos wanted to hear. "I know you will," Abel added, gently. "You always looked out for me."

"This is different," Deimos contended.

"But you're not," Abel put in, defiant. "I know you'll come back, Deimos." Deimos didn't say anything to that, just let his silence answer for him. If convincing himself everything was going to be alright made it okay for Abel then he'd let him think it.

"Have you talked to Cain?" Abel asked after a while, changing the subject.

"Yeah."

"I meant have you said goodbye?"

"No," Deimos honestly replied. Cain wasn't one for hugs and teary goodbyes. He'd told Deimos to try not to die, and that was about as good as it was going to get coming from him.

"Well he's been driving me insane," Abel confessed, dragging out the last word. "He won't stop pacing the room and waking me up all damn night, tossing and turning and _talking_. He says he's not worried, but I know him. He's scared. He does care, Deimos. You should know that before you go."

Deimos couldn't suppress the little ripple of satisfaction it gave him to know that somewhere Cain maybe gave a shit, but he didn't answer Abel. He knew Cain better than Abel did; knew that what looked like worry was probably just Cain sulking at the idea of having to find someone else who'd run around after him.

"Listen, you should get to bed soon," he told Abel then, gently bumping the navigator's shoulder with his. "I should get down to medical if Phobos is still there; he's probably giving them hell by now." He didn't mention he was worried about Phobos too, that there was a part of him that didn't want to be around anyone else. Least in this he and Phobos understood one another.

"Oh." Abel's breath hitched and his fingers tightened. "O-okay then." He made to stand, and Deimos cringed when he saw the crestfallen look on Abel's face, those big glassy eyes blinking at him. He'd been afraid of something like this--afraid of Abel making a big fucking scene out of saying goodbye when it'd only make it harder on both of them.

"I'll be seeing you," he said softly, watching as Abel stared hard at the floor, lower lip trembling.

Abel looked up at him then, shifted anxiously from foot to foot, before he opened his arms and threw himself at Deimos, latching onto him with his arms around Deimos' neck, holding him tight. "Be safe," he whispered into Deimos' ear.

"I will," Deimos promised him. He put his arms around Abel too and held him back, closed his eyes for a second and just stood there, let himself enjoy it before the moment was ripped away from him.

Abel grimaced when they broke apart, eyes fixed on Deimos' mouth. "Deimos," he whispered.

Deimos waited for him to say something else, sure he was going to, but frowned a little when Abel didn't, just stepped closer and leaned down a couple inches, a miserable, hopeless look on his face. It wasn't until Abel's lips brushed his that Deimos realized what was happening, that it was too late to push Abel away, even if he'd wanted to. He wasn't sure he wanted to.

Abel drew back after a split second, though, blushing wildly and avoiding Deimos' eyes. "I'm so sorry," he said breathlessly, pressing the back of his hand to his lips. "I didn't--"

"Don't," Deimos said, cutting him off. He dragged Abel's hand away from his face by the wrist, leaned forward and kissed Abel on the cheek. "You be safe too, alright?" Abel nodded wordlessly, lips drawn tightly together.

Deimos stared at the door for a few minutes after Abel had gone and wondered if he'd messed something up; if he should have taken the opportunity Abel had just handed to him and whether Abel had really meant it anyway.

Too damn late to dwell on it, though. 

Deimos pulled on his jacket and left, headed out to find Phobos and bring him back to their little room to sleep.


End file.
